Hearts and Souls

Last  week, I witnessed tremendous outreach from two individuals, each unbeknownst to the other, who, despite personal loss, sought to inspire, give and encourage, basking in a bright light of positiveness under circumstances that would have caused others to sulk in sorrow.  Although their happenings were different, each individual, chose not to ask for embrace, but to give it instead.  It is humbling and astonishing to see such courage and strength in action.  Prevalent in each is a quiet, peaceful patience and a generosity that comes from deep within...with a pure love from their hearts and souls.


A Cup of Soul Tea™

I wondered what enabled these two beings to act in the manner in which they did.  The answer came to me after I attended a yoga practice in honor of the launching of the e-book, "A Cup of Soul Tea".  The book is a personal evolutionary journey of "transformation from unfulfillment to fulfillment".   My friend, Jen McGown, the author and yogi,  led us in a mindful movement of Anahata, to honor and open our heart chakra.  The practice was intimate, quiet, solemn, focusing on self reflection and meditation.  Afterwards, in a dimmed room illuminated by soft candlelight, we shared in gratitude over a cup of herbal tea.  Although no one was required to, the five of us spoke in whispers.  The ambiance seemed to calm our souls and dictate a peacefulness.  How apropos.  Anahata symbolizes awareness of love, selflessness, and devotion.  The spiritual lesson of Anahata is forgiveness, unconditional love, letting go, and compassion.  When we suffer loss, our heart chakra is wounded and we take it personally.  I was taught that as you move through Anahata postures, it helps to silently recite "blessings, thankfulness, and love" as you forgive those who have caused you pain as well as those whom you have hurt.  This mindful movement opens, cleanses, and heals the heart.  The key to moving forward is loving, in spite of, without malice.  When you are able to do this, you have learned to open your heart.  It takes an incredible faith to love with selflessness - to give while in the midst of pain;  yet,  it is this very thing that fosters rejuvenation.

"Stay true to the song in your heart, while inspiring all those around to a life of abundant gratitude" - Jen McGown

Cha No Yu

In Japan, the tea ceremony, called Cha No Yu,  is a very reverent event.  It is conducted through self refinement with focus on harmony, purity, respect, and serenity.  It, like Jen's ceremony, it conducted with no more than five guests. The objective is to cleanse and clear the heart, creating patience which is the pathway to the soul .

"In your patience, possess ye your soul" - Luke 21:19

What I love about enjoying a cup of tea is the preparation.  To make tea properly takes time.  Time teaches intentional and respectful patience. The practice of Cha No Yu is a lengthy one. It requires patience.  Patience, according to it's definition, is:  to endure calmly when faced with difficulties.   Eighteenth century writer,  Bishop George Horne, states that "patience is the teacher of humility and forgiveness,  cherishes love, strengthens the spirit, subdues pride and extinguishes envy...patience is the preserver of peace".

A Lesson in Patience

Making tea properly, teaches this lesson. When we think of making tea, most of us think of a hot cup with aromatic tendrils wafting up into the air. It is a lovely thought.  To make any tea however, requires a calm, poised endurance.  This summer, I made sun tea.  I love the flavor and natural warmth of the tea from the hot summer sun.  It was a lesson in acceptance of time as I had to wait for the tea set and the flavor to become imbued by the fruit.  The hours it took to make the strong, flavorful tea was worth the wait.  My patience was rewarded by naturalness of the deep fruity taste.  This past week, my friend Chris, did just that.  He has a love that is so deep, so true and that it has filled his heart, overflowing to others with quiet equanimity.  When he experienced a heart-felt pain and injury to his ability to love, instead of closing up to languish in self pity and hurt, he stood still, wide open in the bright light of the sun...deciding to wait patiently for the natural warmth and the reward of a full harmonious flavor.  While he stands for that which he knows will someday return in one form or another, he shines intensely with positive energy, giving and helping others with words of inspiration, motivation, wisdom and even a little humor instead.  He does not know if or when his reward will come - he is not seeking it.  He is prepared to wait, without expectation, possessing clear heart and soul knowing that if it is for him, it shall be.  He exists with a calmness being insistent on not harboring any negativity or any anger at the source of his pain. He encourages all around him to follow his lead...to love from afar is better than not loving at all and to appreciate reception and fulfillment of the experience itself.   I have renamed him a "sweet angel" and am honored to receive his message and to be in his presence as a friend.

"I know it ain't easy giving up your heart"  

Adele, One and Only©2011

Empowerment

The lesson I learned this past week is that while it may seem difficult to give up your heart, you will achieve healing in time through acts of selflessness.  You will be strengthened.  We all have experienced deep loss, hurt, injury and pain. When we reflect upon it, we somehow fail to realize that we do not remain in the place where it occurred whether we've addressed it or not.  While we wait, time still moves and moves us with it.  No one stays in one place in exactly the same point.  We will move - how we move and in which direction we go depends on the strength of our souls, the openness of our hearts and the lessons learned during the quiet period we felt time slow down.  Growth is moving forward while you stand in your patience.  Through generosity, you will gain this openness and vitality. The soul is strengthened when the heart is selfless.  Wear your heart openly and share your soul freely.   It shall empower you.

Namaste.

Yoga: - The Color Green

Each chaka is represented by a color.  The Anahata chakra is represented by the color green.  The symbolism meaning of the color green is self control, renewal, soothing, and relaxation.


As we departed practice, dear Jen gave each of us a gratitude love token.  I have placed mine within a green cloth to remember the day...a little heart filled with a little tea... as a reminder to celebrate the openness of our hearts and the largeness of our souls.


Om Shanti.

Affirmation

 I recently participated in a Mindful Movement Yoga Retreat under the tutelage of my dear friend Jen.  The objective of the retreat was re-establishment of roots, grounding, and realization of self.  One component of this empowering experience that struck a deep somber chord within me was Affirmation.  I've briefly touched upon it before but I don't think I realized how important it really is.  Let's break it down - according to several dictionaries, Affirmation is :

•  to declare as a fact
• to make a declaration with solemn resolve
• to maintain as true; to tell with confidence.....

        solemn - deeply earnest sobriety

        resolve - get, consume, receive, own, ingest

Thus, an affirmation is ownership of your path.  It is true acknowledgement of what, when, why, and how you are, it is declaration of who you are.

Self -Fulfilling Prophecy

We must recognize that affirmation is a serious matter.  We must remember to be careful to how we use our words for the things we say, we believe.  Things we believe, we affirm, even in jest.  How many times have you said or heard someone say, "Oh, this will be the death of me", "You make me sick", "For the life of me I can't...". Oh, I'm such a failure, idiot, klutz, fool, etc"?  We need to choose our words and thoughts wisely for what we think and say will surely become our truths, creating a self-fulfilling prophecy.

"Whatever words we utter should be chosen with care..." ~Buddha

In a previous post, I wrote about looking into self acceptance, about how your actions change when you realize you will not fail. Affirmation allows you to do anything you set out to do, to look into your mirror to speak your truth with confidence.  I realize now that is only a part of the equation.  The other, crucial piece is thinking.  What and how we think is just as important as what we say and do,  for our thoughts become our words, our words become our actions. We must therefore remove those seemingly innocent negative sayings from our thoughts.  For example, why should you be upset when you fail a tough exam when all you said while studying was "Oh, I'll never understand this"?  In this example, you have fulfilled your prophecy and managed to block the flow of positive energy.

Being Mindful

During the retreat, I began to focus on the title "Mindful Movement".  For me it meant small, intimate practice.  While this was true, I've come to the realization that it was also about thought processes and true connections.  Yogini Jen led us in an exercise of self love by giving us an elementary introduction of foot reflexology.  We learned about the different points of the feet and how each point corresponds to a particular organ within the body.  As we practiced techniques massaging the "soles" of our feet, we were learning to be mindful of them, the base of our rooting, the base of our "souls".  We meditated, flowing into affirmation with the focus shifting to being mindful and moving in our thoughts.  The asana and vegan lunch taught us to be mindful of our bodies. Thus, we practiced Yoga, uniting of body, mind, and soul.

As I returned home, I thought, what does is mean to be mindful in thought? It is different for each of us.  Although it's personal and germane to our individuality, regardless of our different acclimation, one thing rings true for each of us, to take heed to choose powerful, action words for they shall become our destiny.   In any high school or university writing course, you are penalized for writing passively.  Use of phrases from the verb pattern "to be" confuses the reader about the subject of the sentence. You are taught and rewarded when you use action words or are more specific.  Therefore, be specific in your affirmation. Do not be afraid to state exactly who you are and what you want.  Let the affirmation examples posted on this page be examples of the  beginning of the sentence you complete for yourself.  Think and affirm in the same manner with positive intention even if you are yet to accomplish a feat.   For example:

"I climb mountains"

Whether you've scaled Mt. Fuji or made it to the top of the small dirt hill in the backyard, is not the action the same once you take that first step, lifting your foot upon the soil?  The person in each instance started at the same point with the same objective.  Think about the statement, 

"Begin with the end in mind" 

(The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People).  

What does it mean to you?  

Try this yogic exercise:

Stop, be still and sit quietly in meditation.  Close your eyes, visualize yourself positively successful in the place or state of  existence you wish.  Realize the influence your thoughts have over your actions and the effect your actions have on your mind, body, and soul.  With this in mind, speak your affirmation out loud, with truth. Absorb and feel good about it...your success awaits you.

Sat Nam

 (Truth is thy name)

Practicing Patience

After standing still on Day 21, I celebrated on Day 24 by having fun in the kitchen coming up with dishes and trying new things. I was so inspired and caught up in the euphoria of it all. As the week wore on, I started doubting my ability to continue to create. I did not want to share my experience. Steadfast and easily not eating meat, I wanted to just absorb "why" I was no longer feeling happy about it. I needed to come to terms with it and determine "how" to move forward. It is always a simple three part process:

1. Yoga - Uddhiyana Bandha which is a cleansing sequence. It helps remove any blockages and helps detoxification.
2. Drink water - a very good friend once told me that water is "brain food" and the essential ingredient you need when it's time to think.
3. Get a mirror - look at yourself and tell the truth.

After yoga, water, and the truth, I realized exactly what my problem was. The same old demon that challenges me from time to time: IMPATIENCE. I wanted it all and I wanted it now.


Multi-Tasking?

I've always been task-driven. This "gift" has provided both positive and negative consequences for me. Positively, it has enabled me to handle many things at the same time, get things done and to make things happen. I can walk and chew gum at the same time. These powerful tools were necessary during my years as a Project Manager. I was the "go-to" girl if you needed objectives delivered successfully, on-time, and within budget. In a results-based, corporate environment, there is little room for patience; you have to make quick, snap decisions, plan strategically, and insure a return of investment. I've honed this quite well after repetitiously performing tasks in "an efficient and timely manner".

Negatively, this gift also developed in an aggressive, assertive, impatient demeanor. I'll take the time right now to apologize to those of you whom I "cut-off" mid sentence to get my point across (so NOT intentional!) It caused me to develop a seemingly insatiable drive to seek out more and more challenging projects. I did it all and did it well. The more I took on, however, the more impatient I became. Get it done, get it done now, get it done fast. Never once did I think about slowing down.

The Need to Change

Fortunately, I managed to realize that I was gaining more through the negative aspects of this "gift" than the positive components. So, with the support of my family, I walked away from corporate life. That was seven years ago. (I'll tell the rest of that story another time.) Fast forward to today. Somehow, impatience keeps rearing its ugly head. With the history of my patience or lack thereof peering over my shoulder like a bad conscience, I realized that I need to do something I really haven't done before - practice patience. I need to change. With all of this behavioral change, the dissection and modification of each component is also crucial for success. Let's start with the definition:

pa·tience  noun  (pr.) \ˈpā-shən(t)s\

the habit of being patient;

having the capacity, will or ability to wait without complaint; steadiness;

endurance or perseverance in the performance of a task;

tolerance; understanding

Wow. That sounds like the definition of yoga and the way to cook beans. So, that's what I did, grateful for the revelation. I thought about how long it takes to make beans correctly.

Takin' It Slow

Traditional cooking is not fast. It is slow. It teaches patience. For some of the tastier meals, the longer it cooks, the better it is. I thought about the process to cook beans. Before you can use them for inclusion in any recipe, you must first:

-wash and drain them
-soak overnight
-wash and drain again
-bring to a slow boil over a medium flame
-reduce heat, simmer 1&1/2hr to 2 hours
-let cool
-ready to inclusion into a meal

So, at the one month point, on eve of Day 30, I looked in the mirror at myself to embrace that I am only at the beginning, to accept that it's okay to take it slow and to "practice patience". I went into the kitchen and just made beans: garbanzo beans, white beans, red beans, black beans, one hour at a time.

Yoga: 1 hour